After years trying for a child without success, I sought solace in online message boards. Before long, I was spending hours a day poring over intimate posts, sharing everything with total strangers. Would it help?
Leanne was having her fringe cut when she was offered fertility drugs. It was leftover stock from her hairdresser’s treatment and she was giving it to Leanne for free on condition that she dispose of the packaging, as it was labelled with the hairdresser’s name and address. Leanne accepted the drugs – it would save months on NHS waiting lists.
A couple of weeks later, Leanne began taking the hormones that would stimulate her ovaries. There was no doctor overseeing the process, no scan or blood test, so Leanne had no idea whether her body was responding correctly. Instead of medical supervision, she followed the advice of several women in a fertility forum. When the pills gave her vertigo, it was these strangers who advised that she should take them at night “so you sleep through the worst of the side-effects”.
Despite the number of people it affects, infertility is often called 'the silent struggle'
I bought everything the women told me to: supplements, teas, acupuncture. They became my doctor, grief counsellor, friend
The thing about fertility forums is that they perpetuate hope – and that is exhausting
Related: Young, hot and bothered: ‘I was a 31-year-old newlywed – and then the menopause hit’
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