These very intimate details of our lives are always requested as if nothing is at stake. It’s laziness masquerading as curiosity
There are suddenly a lot of babies in my life. Lovely, squishy babies that are loud and ridiculous. Babies that squawk and dribble on pets, bibs and other babies. At mealtimes these babies smash already smashed food with their perfect, tiny fists and yet somehow I find them completely remarkable. I never thought I would be the sort of person who talks this much about babies, about starting a family, about parenting. But after a long, complicated road, my partner and I are happy to have finally decided: we do want kids, we really do.
But for us the choice to procreate has come with a caveat: when the subject of starting our family comes up, people contemplate mine and my partner’s bodies before asking “So how will that work?” There’s usually a brief pause as they remember their manners, following up with: “If you don’t mind me asking.”
Related: It’s a woman’s choice: falling fertility rates are not the business of government | Gaby Hinsliff
Asking about queer lifestyles could be seen as a demonstration of being a good ally, but also – it isn’t being a good ally
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