Mother courage: swapping pregnancy in exchange for help | Louise Tickle

Pause, a project that makes women whose children have been removed by the state take contraception to qualify for intensive support, is saving millions – but is it ethical?

‘Will you make sure you put in that I love my kids, so much?” says Lisa Filton, 31, tears streaking her face. She pushes long dark hair back with a hand tattooed with the names of her son and two daughters. None of her children live with her. Two were removed as babies and adopted. Her eldest daughter was taken into foster care aged four. Domestic violence is one of the main reasons she lost her children.

Before getting a phone call 18 months ago from a project called Pause, which works with women who have had multiple children removed, Filton, who lives in Hull, was homeless and desperate. After each child was taken, “social services basically chuck you in a ditch, or they might as well have”, she says. The complete lack of support offered to women experiencing deep trauma after losing a child to the state is a brutal reminder that they are nobody’s priority now, just as many never were during their own childhoods, ravaged by sexual abuse, violence and neglect.

If they get pregnant during the programme, we’ve set them up to fail

If the project were rolled out nationally, in five years more than £2.5bn could be saved

Related: Are we taking too many children into care?

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Protection from redundancy for pregnant women to be reviewed

UK business department promises consultation on women’s rights but dismisses calls to extend time limit for bringing cases to tribunal

Pregnant women and new mothers may need greater protection from redundancy, the government has said. Margot James, a business minister, promised a consultation on how to protect women from losing their jobs when they become parents, after a call for action from the House of Commons women and equalities committee.

The review by the Department for Business, Energy and Industrial Policy commits to “making sure new and expectant mothers have sufficient protections from redundancy”, without specifying what measures would be brought forward.

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It’s not just pregnant women. We all need solace on the grisly trains | Catherine Shoard

An app encourages commuters to offer up their seats. But demanding special treatment for one group feels silly when rush hour is hideous for everyone

As someone who likes badges (especially if they’re free) as well as the chirpy aesthetic of London Underground design and being pregnant after a fairly long haul, I was initially pleased with my baby-on-board badge. It’s an easy way to convey news, and wins you smiles from strangers on the street – and sometimes even a seat.

The logic was that people were too engrossed in their phones to notice bumps waggling unhappily in front of their handbag

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How risky are caesarean births?

This week an inquest found that Frances Cappuccini, a 30-year-old primary school teacher, died unnecessarily when a caesarean went wrong. What are the dangers – and the facts?

Are caesareans risky?
The evidence is mixed. The American College of Obstetricians and Gynaecologists (ACOG) estimates there are about four maternal deaths for every 100,000 women after vaginal deliveries compared to 13 in 100,000 after caesareans (though some of these women would have been at higher risk of complications to begin with). The Birth Trauma Association found that mortality rates are lowest for women who have elective caesareans.

Related: In Greece, mothers face hardship in pregnancy and trauma giving birth – in pictures

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A moment that changed me: holding the newborn baby I never thought I’d have | David Akinsanya

As a gay man I doubted I’d become a father. With my son in my arms for the first time, I wept – for myself growing up in care and for the future with a family

I never thought I would become a father. I grew up in care and as far back as I can remember I had issues with my sexuality. By the time I was in my 20s I had accepted that I was gay, even though I’d had a couple of heterosexual flings. Over the years, through my work as a mentor and as a foster carer, I met a number of youngsters whom I took care of and some of whom called me Dad. But I’d always wanted to have my own child too.

I met the mother of my child through work. I was delivering health and well-being workshops, and she wanted to talk about the possibility of fostering. We became friends: unbeknown to me pretty early on she decided that I was the ideal candidate to father her child. P was a heterosexual, professional woman in her early 30s. She had always wanted to have a child with a gay man – and someone who really wanted to be a father.

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The sad truth about having a baby: ‘cattle’ care is now the norm | Milli Hill

A new report confirms our worst fears about lack of midwives and lack of continuity. The situation is frustrating and dangerous – and it’s getting worse

It’s the most important, meaningful and – for many – anxiety-provoking day of your life. You’re going to experience the rare privilege of being at the centre of the action as a new life begins. Added to this, you may well be naked and somewhat indisposed. Who would you choose to be with you? Someone you know and trust? Or a total stranger? It’s a no-brainer, isn’t it?

And yet a report published today by the National Federation of Women’s Institutes (NFWI) and childbirth charity the NCT has shown, yet again, that this most obvious of human needs is simply not being met for women. Rather than being accompanied by a familiar and trusted figure, most women (88%) surveyed did not know their midwife when they went into labour or gave birth. Of these women, 12% said this made them feel alone and vulnerable, and 6% said they felt unsafe. Comments were made comparing treatment to that of cattle, and like being on a conveyor belt.

One solution women could opt for – an independent midwife –has also just been removed

Related: UK midwife shortage leaves women feeling like cattle, report finds

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Experience: I had a stroke while I was pregnant

‘I tried to sit up, but the nurse told me that I would fall out of bed, because I had no sitting balance. I thought, “Are you on crack? Of course I can sit up!” But she was right: I was paralysed down my left-hand side’

On the morning of Saturday 25 August 2012, my husband, Tony, took a photo of me in my nightie, proudly showing off my bump. I was 38 and after five miscarriages and losing one baby in what had started as a twin pregnancy, this little life had clung on and I had reached 26 weeks.

My blood pressure, which my GP had asked me to monitor, was very low, so instead of going on a long walk as normal, I took my husband breakfast in bed and started reading the papers.

Related: How do I reduce the risk of having a stroke?

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‘As she is born, part of me is dying’ – how becoming a mother changes you

Books speak of pregnancy as a pastel-hued dream. But the idea that suddenly you have so much more to lose can be frightening

For many years, having a child was the thing I desired most of all. Unlike other desires, I couldn’t articulate why. It was beyond language. I want to study blah because blah; I want to work at blah because blah. Obvious, easy. Why did I want a child? I just did. My cells did. For all my concern about bringing another carbon footprint into the world, I couldn’t hush a life-longing, that I put aside until the time was right.

When I try to explain the complex emotions of pregnancy, the words elude me. I am consumed by fear and desire for the baby. Fear that she will die inside me; hope that she will be alive when she comes out. My happiness is anchored to something I cannot control. It is not entirely comfortable. It is not the pastel-hued seventh heaven that pregnancy books speak of. Suddenly, I have so much more to lose.

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IVF pregnancy less successful with two embryos, study finds

Research shows if a healthy embryo is transferred alongside one of poorer quality then chance of pregnancy is reduced by 27%

Implanting two embryos during IVF can cut the chance of becoming pregnant by more than a quarter if one of the embryos is in a poorer state of health, new research suggests.

A study of almost 1,500 embryos that were implanted in women of all ages found that putting back a healthier embryo with one of poorer quality dramatically cut the chance of a successful pregnancy compared to just transferring one embryo.

Related: New DNA test for embryos could boost IVF success rates

Related: Boys conceived through IVF technique have lower than average fertility

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