We can find a way for men to talk about abortion without infringing a woman’s autonomy or speaking over her
As the conversation about abortion rages, it strikes me that I have never heard a man tell his abortion story publicly. The emphasis on disclosure when it comes to abortion means that we have become used to hearing women’s stories. But what, if you’ll forgive me for ironically borrowing a well-worn phrase, about the men? We hear a lot, too much, from men who are anti-abortion, and little from those who support it, or who have benefited from it.
When the New York Times asked men to come forward with their abortion stories, the social media response was mixed. There were the men who thought the whole thing was hilarious, as though the thought of abortion had never troubled them. There were those who thought we shouldn’t hear from men about abortion at all, that men should stay out of it. And then there were those who felt perhaps that having men as allies could bolster the cause; that framing it as a “women’s problem” – and not a vital element of family planning that benefits people regardless of gender – plays into the hands of the conservative Christian right.
Rhiannon Lucy Cosslett is a Guardian columnist
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